I had not planned to walk outside last night to look at the moon. My friends will think that an odd statement coming from someone who lives by the ebb & tide of such things. But I have been in a pretty deep funk over how life’s been going lately and I didn’t even feel like stepping outside. For the past few weeks I have been experiencing this intense, for lack of a better word, buzzing in my body but because I did not know what it was I labeled it as anxiety. When I remembered to do my deep breathing and sit in meditation I would find that it was not anxiety at all but rather felt like I had been plugged into a energy source that was extremely powerful and recharging me way beyond anything I’ve ever experienced before. When in meditation I could actually see a bright light surrounding my skeletal system and even hear a light buzz. But, I have felt a bit jaded lately about such things, so I decided I just needed to calm myself down and have more discipline in my meditations.
All day I had been feeling this ‘pulling’ sensation in my heart area and thought to myself “what is going on?” And so last night, because of all the body buzzing and heart pulling, I was wide awake. It was hard to ignore the full moon light seeping through my window but I was not having any of it and was determined to stay in my little cocoon. At the moment I am reading three books at the same time so I picked up the book my friend Steve recommended called; ‘Journey of Souls.’ and set my sights on finishing it.
As I am reading I can feel the buzzing in my body starting to amp up. Then I feel this feeling in my chest begins to increase as if my heart is pushing forward against my chest. I tried to ignore it and kept on reading but it finally got so intense I had absolutely no choice but to walk outside into moonlight. I literally felt as if I was being pulled, very rapidly now, out the door. I managed to grab an amulet of moonstone and garnets that I wear during ceremonies and pulled it over my head as I glided outside my robe loosely over my shoulders. It was pitch black out except for the moon. I could feel my body vibrating faster and faster as I stepped out and faced this beautiful Goddess of light. Not a sound could be heard except the beating of my heart now happy to have the moonlight caressing it. My face suddenly broke into a big smile and with my eyes glued to the moon I became entranced and began to sing. It surprised me the immensity of the joy that I felt and the song that so easily poured from my lips for this powerful being of light. Standing there in the dark I allowed the robe to slip from my shoulders while every cell of my being celebrated being permeated by this powerful, powerful energy. My spirit filled with peace for the first time in months and I lovingly laughed at myself for being so fearful and not understanding how to wield this new & immense energy of love and transformation that is coming into the earth right now. I stood there a long time with my arms spread open and my beautiful moon and garnet amulet glowing on my chest while the Moonlight pulsated through me. I continued to sing, swirl around and even do a little dance as my smile grew bigger and bigger and my heart released its fear.
I walked back in the house with a full and open-heart so very grateful to be alive at this time on the planet. Thank you God, thank you life, for shining so brightly and singing so loudly that I had no choice but to sing my song, bear my soul and dance my dance for you.